One Writer’s Journey to Find Her Haven
Over the decades, I have continuously been a part of writing groups. They are a marvellous place to meet writers. I’ve been a participant, but mostly I have been the facilitator, or leader, if you will. Put that education to good use and martyred myself — #lamejoke. To cut to the chase, in my experience, there are two types of writers’ groups, what I call cold groups and warm groups. Warning I might be an itty-bitty bit biased.
The Cold Writers’ Group
I started my “journey” amongst the cold. These writers’ groups attract serious people. Some might die if they cracked a smile. Members attend to either learn or read their stories out. Their interest in others is lacking. The more advanced writers want to show off and look down on beginners. Superiority complexes and giant heads. All groups give off a vibe. It usually isn’t one person who sets the tone of the group. I can’t stress enough — I am referring to a collective vibe. You know the group. We’ve all been in them. They have long silences, and you always feel like an outsider. Awkward.
I found individually most people were fine, but others were downright rude or batty. They saw the organisation as a product. In all fairness, they were paying too much not to have high expectations. Management turned toxic and wanted to appeal to the more educated types who could afford to pay. It happens in the best of places. The writing centre caters to a lot of people who have no issue with the barrier between people; student/teacher, poor/rich, beginner/advanced — stroking of d… egos. Not what I am about, sorry. I was ordered to make people who were embarrassed they had no money to pay. Keep in mind, my services were free. Hell, they wanted me to pay. Granted, I refused on both accounts. During my time there, I saw more sensitive writers struggle, some crushed. It’s hard sharing at the best of times. Sharing amongst friends is much easier.
The Warm Writers’ Group
I wanted something more. A desire to connect to other writers on a human level. I started volunteering at my local library. Immediately, the library asked me to help out with their writers’ group. Over a decade and I am still there!
The small group of about 6 consisted of friendly people who wanted nothing more than to write and chat. The group is a living entity and changes with the members. My driving force became “friendship first.” Friends share with friends. It doesn’t matter if a writer is a beginner or seasonal, let’s inspire each other. Everyone can bring something to the table. We all consume stories. It is a huge challenge trying to cater to diversity in skill, genre, and fluctuating group size. I have mastered the art… I hope… I’m always perfecting my techniques.
Being a leader is the hardest thing I have ever done. No… actually that award goes to putting down elderly childhood Mog. But I’m sure you get my point? University doesn’t teach life skills. Managing groups is difficult, like fumbling in the dark to pee. And sometimes, you, well, wet yourself or — yeah, I’m not finishing that sentence. 💩
Today, we have an awesome group, twice the size it used to be. We’re back on track. Reining in 12+ passionate writers is a challenge. We go off the rails from time to time. New members are embraced like long-time participants of the group. I know this is rather sappy coming from a snarky beetch. So much trial and error along the way. Over the years I’ve wanted to quit, but every time amazing people have supported me, even if I didn’t always see it because that’s what friends do. My trials and errors are another story — the tears, the burnout, and the bonkers.
Takeaway
Writers have their own tastes, wants, and needs. Some thrive in cold groups. It’s like cutting the crap and getting down to business. For them, feedback is the most important and a professional vibe drives them. We’ve lost the odd member to a local cold group and I am happy for them. Writer choice is the key.
Other people prefer a group where they can ask other writers, “Hey, should I kill my character? He’s pissing me off.” The answer: will doing so turn you on?
Ok, that’s a stupid question and a more stupid answer just to show members can ask anything. I find questions and answers invaluable and they can be random because creative writing is random. There are so many possible discussion topics; publishing, editing, plotting, AI, genres, apps — and so on. And of course, I’m a know-it-all and love sharing, so that helps. The other members teach me things every session.
If one group isn’t your brew, try another. Members make the group. And yes, I’ve had to deal with the weird and wonderful, but that’s a story for later.
Sharing the Love
I wrote this because the writing group had a meeting yesterday and I’ve come away feeling a passion to work on The ImmorTales (my novel series). For the past week and a bit, I’ve been busy blogging and working on flash fiction. My writing buddy (the one who cracks the whip as my daily check-in) calls it a distraction. I suspect he is right, but for Pete’s sake, nobody tell him.
~*~
THE WRITING ASYLUM 
Leave a comment